Etiquette Mistakes That Get You Blacklisted as a Guest

Krystal Smith

It is exciting to be invited to an event, whether at a wedding at a fancy hotel or an intimate dinner at a friend’s house. As being a guest is a privilege, we explore 18 ways that you risk being an unwelcome guest so that you can take note not to act this way the next time you get a prized invite/

Ignoring the Invitation

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Your host will have spent time, effort, and money devising a guest list and creating invitations. You should RSVP promptly, and if something unavoidable comes up, communicate as soon as possible, giving a good reason for not attending.  

Arriving Excessively Early or Late

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Even small events are planned carefully, whether when the drinks will be ready for arrival or when the meat will be taken out of the oven. It would help if you respected the designated time, as arriving too early disrupts the host’s preparations while being late, which shows a lack of consideration.

Bringing Uninvited Guests

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Unless explicitly mentioned in the invite, don’t assume you can bring additional people, as your unexpected guest may not have a seat or food. If you can only attend with somebody, call to speak to the event organizer to ask permission to be a plus-one so they can be catered for. 

Overstaying Your Welcome

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The host likely has a schedule or intended duration for the gathering. Overstaying throws their plans off-balance and could prevent them from tending to other commitments or simply enjoying some personal time. This is especially true if you are in somebody’s home and may want to retire for the evening. 

Criticizing the Food or Ambiance

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Negative comments can dampen the mood and make the host feel self-conscious or embarrassed. While it is good to have an opinion on the evening, try to be discreet when giving feedback to your guests. If you need help eating the food, tell them it is simply down to your preference rather than their hosting skills. 

Offering Unsolicited Help

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Events involve numerous logistical aspects, and the host might have delegated tasks or have a specific way they want things handled. You can let your guest know you are willing to help but wait to be asked before taking over kitchen duties or rearranging furniture.

Treating the House Disrespectfully

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The house is the host’s personal space, and treating it disrespectfully shows a lack of regard for their belongings and the effort they put into maintaining it. Think about how you would like guests to behave in your home and treat the home you are in the same. 

Loud or Boisterous Behavior

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Excessively loud talking, shouting, or boisterous behavior can disrupt the intended atmosphere and make it easier for others to converse or enjoy the event you have kindly been invited to. 

Gossiping or Engaging in Drama

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Gossip spreads negativity, can damage reputations, and causes unnecessary tension among guests. Instead, keep the conversation light and avoid bringing negativity or personal issues into the host’s space.

Monopolizing the Host’s Attention

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If the host’s attention is solely focused on you, other guests may feel ignored, hindering their opportunity to connect with the host and other attendees.

Oversharing

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Providing too much information to the people you are mingling with can cause discomfort and may embarrass your host. Avoid bringing up overly personal topics and controversial opinions; keep the conversation light and conversational. 

Public Displays of Affection

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While small shows of affection, such as a peck on the cheek or holding hands, may be appropriate at a dinner party, excessive or overly passionate displays can be inappropriate. Keep affection displays appropriate for the setting and respectful of other guests.

Treating the Bathroom Like Your Own Spa

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The bathroom is a private area within the host’s home. Using it excessively or for extended personal pampering shows a lack of regard for their space and resources.

Using the Host’s Wi-Fi Without Asking

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If you are at a close friend’s house, they are unlikely to mind you jumping on their Wi-Fi. For anyone else, you should always inquire before connecting to their network.

Making Unreasonable Demands

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Guests should be mindful of the limitations the host might face. Excessive requests disregard their comfort level and ability to accommodate every wish. Unreasonable demands can lead to stress, resentment, or conflict between the guest and the host.

Arriving Empty-Handed

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A thoughtful thank-you note or a small gift expressing gratitude to your guest is welcomed, even when people insist you don’t need to bring anything. You don’t always need to take an expensive bottle of wine; some chocolate or flowers are acceptable. 

Forgetting to Thank Your Host

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Make sure that you tell your host what a good time you have had and show your appreciation before leaving. This can be verbal on the evening and in a follow-up thank-you note or text message.

Ignoring Dietary Restrictions

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If you have specific dietary needs, politely communicate them beforehand to avoid causing any inconvenience on the night. Some people with particular food allergies may offer to bring their food or help the host prepare their meals to avoid any issues. 

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